All Hail the Fuckers at LiveJournal

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I visited livejournal.com and printed a list of Live Journal interest areas.  These are tabulated automatically when these bitches write profiles that tell the world what they’re into.  If one of them lists “pizza” in her profile, pizza gets one vote in Live Journal’s list of what’s hot.

Pizza was #116 on the list, by the way.  Take a minute to think about all the things in the world that are interesting.  Now try to absorb the fact that these losers can’t find 115 things more interesting than pizza.

The fuckers like cheese (#34 on the list) better than Nirvana (#41).  In fact they like cheese more than beer, baseball, sushi, and God (#140).  Sure, people get all Rosemary’s Baby about God, and cheese is a mysterious substance.  I mean, is it a plastic, or what?  But what kind of fuckhead finds cheese more interesting than Bjork (#234), or dreams (#103), or New York City (#351)?

Sleeping is more popular than laughing, boys are more popular than girls, reading more popular than writing, and eyeliner (#160) tops Moulin Rouge (#296).  OK, the bitches got something right.  Ewan McGregor’s hot bod couldn’t rescue hour after insufferable hour of Nicole Kidman pretending she could act and sing.  I can’t stand watching her smug mug on TV talk shows.  She looks like an overcooked piece of white asparagus with lipstick.

Most puzzling to moi is the fact that drugs, #313 on the list, rated far lower than Harry Fucking Potter, Starbucks, and shoes.  Dear one, if you mainline a shoe, will you see a thousand tiny red faces floating a foot above your head, smiling and saying that everything will be OK?  Will your body shrink to a tenth its size while you stand in front of an open closet door, pushing aside enormous shirts on enormous coat hangers?  Will the subway car rattle you like a coin in a glass jar as you strain to understand how heads go completely bald?  Will it?  Well then, go fuck yourself if you think shoes are more interesting than drugs.

I mean it, go fuck yourself.

Comments

[et alia]

That's pretty much true about LJ users. I suspect it's mostly used by middle-middle to upper-middle class teens and early-twenty-sometings who want to scream about the injustices visited upon them by their parents/teachers/professors/lovers/friends. It's a shame, since the software platform offers some nice features.